The Giving Tree

 The most exciting and fulfilling part of my week is when I get to teach in the Creative and Talented Programme. We started this programme for very bright children who struggle to remain in the classroom fulltime because their attention wanders, they need more stimulation, and they need to be supported emotionally in a world they don’t gel with easily. 
 

I teach twelve- and thirteen-year-old children and currently we are dealing with social and emotional issues related to teams, being alone, loneliness and leadership.  This week’s topic was ‘are we always responsible for our actions’ and ‘what do we do when we regret our actions later ‘.

To introduce the topic, I used The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein, a line drawn picture book with a powerful message. We often introduce our topics through Philosophy with Children, an education method used all over the world. The story involves a ’boy’ who loves a tree. She, the tree, loves him back and when he is young, they spend lots of time together. As he gets older, they spend less time and when he is with her, he is sad. He tells her he needs money and so she gives him her apples to sell. He comes back when he is older and needs a home for his family, so she gives him her branches. When he is older still and needs a boat, she gives him her trunk. The book ends with him sitting on her stump looking sad.

 

After discussing with my children about whether the boy was right or wrong, and did he know whether he was right or wrong, I asked the children to think back to similar situation for themselves. Had this happened to them or a family member? After some time in serious thought, I asked them to each tell a story, in third person, about a similar situation.

Third person is ideal for this type of personal story telling because it allows children to confide in others without blame because officially it ‘isn’t them’ in the story.

 

Wow did we tear up as child after child revealed a sad incident from their past, or from their family history. Most of the stories revolved around precious toys or pets who were abandoned as the child got older, but some were so poignant. Here are some of them:

 

A new nanny started to work at a family house and she was a very good worker. After tidying and cleaning the whole house, she unpacked the children’s cupboards. There were many grubby old toys slung into the back of a cupboard, and so she threw them away, knowing that the children of the house had many new shiny things to play with now. One of the toys thrown away was a dirty rag rabbit that had been loved by the daughter of the house since she was two. This rabbit had been given to her by her granny who had since died. The daughter of the house never saw that rabbit again. 

Once there was a boy who was interested in geckos, so he caught one and kept it in a box. Every day he caught insects for the gecko to eat, he chatted to eat when he returned from school, and he even taught the gecko to play with a marble. In the past year the boy found a box in his room and when he opened it, he found a pile of bones and some skin with the marble.

Years ago, there was a young woman at university who played in a girls’ band. Although the band wasn’t famous everybody loved to hear them play together and so they were offered a chance to play overseas. The young woman found out that she was pregnant with a child at that time and her dilemma was should she raise a family or go overseas with her friends in the band. That young lady now has two daughters.

 

The emotional maturity shown by these beautiful children blew me away last week. I realized again how important it is for me to teach, and how important it is for principals to teach. How else do you as a principal continue to do what drew you into the education sector originally and keeps you firing on all cylinders?

Using wheelchairs to learn about disability.....

Pinelands North Primary regularly rents wheelchairs to assist our pupils to 'walk in other peoples' shoes'! Every child has an opportunity to spend some of a day in wheelchair, trying to get around and do normal every day things without standing up. For most this is the first time they get to appreciate how disabled people manage daily. After the last opportunity, the grade 6 pupils were asked to answer some questions. These are their answers: 

My first day in a wheelchair was:

exciting, scary, fun, relaxing, lovely, different, challenging, strange, tiring, cool, difficult, frustrating, 

I found: going through the passage with lots of people, moving around outside the classroom, trying to park in a perfect position, maneuvering around, going to the toilet (lots found this challenging), getting through the classroom door, going anywhere, not being able to move my legs, pushing uphill, 

Most challenging but really enjoyed: sitting down for the day, sitting in a soft chair, riding around, watching how people treated me while in the wheelchair, rolling around the playground and passages, getting pushed around by others, experiencing how someone else feels in a wheelchair, going down ramps (lots loved this).

What I learnt from this experience was:  

that I must not take life for granted. You can live a normal life, like anyone else, while in a wheelchair. 

that it is not easy to move around and it took a lot of problem solving.

I need to be thankful for what I have and must never take it for granted.

that it is hard being in a wheelchair.

not to make fun of those around you who are in a wheelchair or are different to you.

we must appreciate our legs.

that people in a wheelchair have a hard time getting around.

I must be thankful for what God has given me.

I now know:

that people in wheelchairs are special, just like us.

how people in wheelchairs manage their daily lives.

that life is much harder for disabled people.

that different people have different struggles.

that it is easier to walk with two legs, than to ride in a wheelchair with none.

I must be thankful for what I have and must take care of myself.

I must respect others in wheelchairs.

Going forward, I will try to:

to help others and to be a good friend to those in a wheelchair.

respect people in wheelchairs, because it is very difficult doing things on your own.

to keep my legs safe.

to treat people equally.

to take care of what I have.

Ways to challenge gender stereotypes in your home

Before your precious baby is born, people have created a stereotypical picture of your child. Gender Reveal Parties, Baby Showers, gifts from the family and shopping centres identify your child as either a boy or a girl, usually with the accompanying colour range. Some families choose not to follow this stereotypical view and know that gender is actually on a continuum with many possibilities, between ‘he man’ and ‘tinker bell’, with all people falling somewhere inbetween. 

Some schools have started to be far more inclusive of gender difference and are actively challenging these stereotypes in the classrooms daily. Family homes can reinforce or break down this learning, and support for this world view definitely assists children to integrate into the world far better. Here are some tips on breaking down the gender barriers in your home:

 

Ensure your home reflects that it is okay to be different in the wider sense of the word. Actively seek out role models to interact with as a family, particularly those who are different from you. Families with parents of the same sex, families with only one parent and traditional families can assist children to understand what is ‘normal, even if it doesn’t copy their family.

Challenge stereotypes when you hear them at home amongst your family. Family get togethers are a perfect time to talk about stereotypes, with most adults still being scathing of people who are different to themselves. Enter serious discussions and include your children, even if the topic is heated. Use inclusive language too: ‘moffie’, ‘fag’ and ‘bunny’ are words that children should be told are not acceptable. Reward your children for standing up against discrimination.

 

Picture books and story books are good ways to introduce difference in gender into your home. Julian is a Mermaid by Jessica Love and The Girl with Two Dads by Mel Elliott are two of the books Pinelands North uses in their Philosophy for Children course. Both of these books challenge stereotypical lifestyles. Challenge stereotypes too by encouraging your children to play with toys that are not conventionally ‘boys’ or ‘girls’ toys: boys love dolls houses and girls love car garages too!

 

Look at the spaces in your home and ensure they don’t reinforce stereotypes. Dads calling a room the ‘mancave’ and having a pink frilly ‘princess’ bathroom for your daughter instil views that men should have caves and girls should like pink frilly things! The jobs in the house should be shared but not by gender: anyone should be able to iron, wash the car or the dishes, and water the garden.

 

And finally try to attend conferences and courses on gender differences to ensure you have the correct information. A good place to find information on this topic is through FaceBook – there are several very good sites you can join to find out the most up to date pronouns and research available. Through you, a whole generation of future adults could be far less discriminatory than the adults of today!

 

 

Top class principals are needed, now more than ever!

Reflecting on the lockdown, and on what has made some schools flourish and others languish, is the quality of the principal. I don’t mean ‘smart’ principals, or ‘wealthy school’ principals or principals with loads of experience…..I mean the best kind of principal! Cornerstones of a good principal’s leadership are genuine caring, good guidance counselling for children and staff, internationalism and a shared leadership structure.

A school that succeeds has a principal who dares to share authority and responsibility with parents, staff and pupils. This lockdown has been devastating for some families, including staff, as many have lost their jobs or businesses, and now face financial ruin. Weekly letters from the principal to families, and a daily voice-note to staff, makes a huge difference in how the individuals then face every day. When principals are society influencers and positive role models, the school community is able to follow their positive leadership. 

A good principal allows an efficient use of mental and financial resources and understands that good ideas should not be concealed but be further developed by colleagues at other schools too. The goal of the principal should be to develop the whole education system, not place obstacles in the way of ‘rival’ schools. Although schools can and should be different, collaboration between schools should mean that not every school needs to ‘push every boulder’, but rather learn from those who have already have done so. This collaboration means that schools could focus on different areas and share their findings. Principals should also build collaborative relationships with the surrounding community, so the school becomes a living part of the surrounding society.

 

Children study for themselves, not for the school, the principal, or their parents. They need to be active citizens in their own schooling. This lockdown has given children the perfect opportunity to do this. Many are now researching things they have never had the opportunity or time to do. Several PNPS children have used the opportunity to ‘Skype a Scientist’ and have learnt things that scientists research, from all parts of the world. The learning during lockdown needs to be carefully curated to provide opportunities for children to address relevant issues in the world, deal with their emotions and develop life skills for the future. Even during lockdown, we are working with those who will change our future and influence the world through their values.

 

A principal’s attitude to internationality will determine whether the school follows international trends, gets involved internationally or just survives in its community. During the lockdown there have been so many opportunities for principals to research international trends, to predict the future or to make plans. As a country we are lucky to be behind the rest of the world in this pandemic. Schools around the world have succeeded or been disasters, and all we as principals need to do is encourage pioneering teachers to try things they thought previously unacceptable in the teaching arena. Success is at the end of our fingertips!